Posts Tagged ‘Snowden’

The FSB (the secret police formerly known as the KGB) is busy preparing for the Sochi Olympics where they hope to strategically pair at least 4 militarized cops for every suicide bomber emerging from the Caucasus woodshed like drunken uncles with roman candles on prom night. Sochi is the summer paradise of Soviet bureaucracy, where the Bolsheviks would recuperate along the caviar-enriched beaches of the Black Sea. Now those Cold War summer homes are the site of the Winter Games and they happen to be in spitting distance of bullied Georgia and embattled Chechnya. Ill tidings await NBC and the rest of the world. But what of… beyond?

My numerologist said 2013 would be a year of forced confessions. We’ve learned much about Tiger Woods and the NSA in that time span all thanks to Edward Snowden (the mystery driver of Tiger’s Escalade and the Benedict who stole the secrets of the “No Such Agency”). Now Snowden is hanging out in Moscow within the grip of Vlad Putin, the latest tyrannical star of Russia’s Cult of Personality (following in the footsteps of Lenin, Stalin and Little Niki Kruschev), which means Putin’s KGB chums have in their hands the complete batch of stolen American secrets. While Western media outlets have slowly divulged the secrets provided to them, what spicy details might be released from Russia’s corruptible spies?

News of America being puppeteered by pale and lanky aliens! That’s what.

Iranian News Agency FARS is propagandizing this image to its people

Iranian News Agency FARS is propagandizing this image to its people

According to Iran’s Fars News Agency, (DON’T CLICK THIS LINK UNLESS YOU WANT THE NSA TO KNOW YOU CLICK LINKS TO IRANIAN NEWS AGENCIES) Snowden Documents Proving “US-Alien-Hitler” Link Stun Russia.

So dig this baby – not only does Iranian media say Snowden has evidence Obama is the puppet under the control of “Tall White” aliens who once backed Hitler, but the former Canadian Minister of Defense Paul Hellyer agreed in his interview on Russian TV this month. Hellyer’s “Tall White” aliens operate out of Nevada with America’s Air Force and they go on shopping sprees to Vegas dressed as nuns.

But back to the Iranian 4th Estate…

Snowden’s apparent “leaks” speak of alien-inspired submarines in the 1930s to help the Nazi cause. In 1954, United States President and hero of the sequel to the first Great War, Ike Eisenhower met with “Tall White” Nordic aliens and agreed to create a “secret regime” which still rules American politics.

And you – dear reader – laughed when I spoke of writing underground. This shit is paranoia-inducing, unless of course you are paranoid already and expecting such rando-insaneness. The Wash-Po and Forbes have already read through these strange musings and call them propaganda to paint Americans as other-worldly evil to the people of Iran, who happen to be closing in on being nuke-capable.

Before I close out this post, I did want to provide some background into the “Tall White” theory. Below is a transcript from the beginnings of the Russia Today interview with the former Canadian Defense Minister:

Sophie Shevardnadze: Our guest today is the Honorable Paul Hellyer, former minister of Defense of Canada, and he believes that life forms from space are present on Earth. It’s great to have you on our show. Why do you say that UFOs are as real as airplanes flying over our heads?

Hellyer? Hell Yeah!

Hellyer? Hell Yeah!

Paul Hellyer: Because I know that they are. As a matter of fact, they’ve been visiting our planet for thousands of years and one of the cases that would interest you most if you give me two or three minutes to answer is that during the Cold War, 1961, there were about 50 UFOs in formation flying south from Russia across Europe, and Supreme Allied Command was very concerned and about ready to press the ‘Panic’ button when they turned around and went back over the North Pole. They decided to do an investigation and they investigated for 3 years and they decided that, with absolute certainty, four species – at least – had been visiting this planet for thousands of years. We have a long history of UFOs and of course there has been a lot more activity in the last few decades, since we invented the atomic bomb and they are very concerned about that and the fact that we might use it again, and because the Cosmos is a unity and it affects not just us but other people in the Cosmos, they are very much afraid that we might be stupid enough to start using atomic weapons again, and this would be very bad for us and for them as well.


During World War II, American industry joined in the war efforts by adjusting the products coming down the assembly line: automotive companies began churning out tank widgets and cowboy boot cobblers began cobbling combat boots. With the close of the hot war (and the rise of the cold one), it was clear the United States military could not continue to rely on peacetime industries to always support wartime production needs. What was born was a Military Industrial Complex – a new market burgeoning out of the demand for more weapons. Weapons were stockpiled against perceived threats and as long as there was a constant threat of something Out There (or hiding under the bed, for that matter) there would be a demand for more: more devastating bombs, shinier bombs, smarter bombs, etcetera, etc., et al.

In his grand exit from the White House, President and General Dwight D Eisenhower, warned the American citizenry of this Military Industrial Complex…

In the councils of government, we must guard against the acquisition of unwarranted influence, whether sought or unsought, by the military industrial complex. The potential for the disastrous rise of misplaced power exists and will persist. We must never let the weight of this combination endanger our liberties or democratic processes. We should take nothing for granted. Only an alert and knowledgeable citizenry can compel the proper meshing of the huge industrial and military machinery of defense with our peaceful methods and goals, so that security and liberty may prosper together.

During the Cuban Missile Crisis, war seemed inevitable between the United States and Revolutionary Cuba’s financier, the Soviet Union. John F Kennedy was in the White House and through diplomacy there was a peace to be found. Kennedy also sought to pull troops out of Vietnam. This was not what the Military Industrial Complex had in mind. The Gods of War found an ally in the mob. While Joe Kennedy’s ties to the mafia helped secure the union vote in favor of his son’s presidency, JFK and RFK turned against their father’s criminal chums and began a campaign against the mob. Surrounded by enemies, conspiracy began to brew… In November of 1963, there was an assassination plot uncovered in Chicago where a lone-nut sniper was to fire upon the presidential motorcade. Days later on 11/18/63, JFK was in Tampa where Jackie Kennedy refused to ride in the motorcade because of the perceived danger. Secret Service security was heightened and the Tampa threat was never realized. Four days later in Dallas, no threat was perceived, but that does not explain the sudden strategy change in Secret Service detail (no agents on the running boards, police escort leaving the flanks of the presidential limo vulnerable, a changed motorcade route). JFK was assassinated on November 22, 1963, in what was a political coup by the Military Industrial Complex who tagged LBJ as a more compliant successor.

Oh, God, can you ever imagine what would happen to the country if Lyndon were president?

– JFK to his wife, according to Jackie’s memoirs

LBJ and the Kennedy Brothers, RFK and JFK

LBJ and the Kennedy Brothers, RFK and JFK

President Lyndon B Johnson assigned the Warren Commission to “investigate” the assassination, but this investigation began with a conclusion: Lee Harvey Oswald was a lone nut who acted alone. Working from that conclusion, the Warren Commission Omission went backwards to prove its thesis with theories including magic bullets from an ineffective Italian rifle. Hours after the assassination, Oswald was confronted by police for sneaking into a movie theater without a ticket. When he was arrested, Lee Harvey Oswald thought it was for punching a police officer in the theater. Two days later, Jack Ruby approached the heavily guarded Oswald and murdered him, which conveniently kept the “lone nut” from getting his day in court. If Lee Harvey Oswald was ever tried in court for the assassination, there would have never been enough evidence to convict him beyond a reasonable doubt. There was a conspiracy to kill JFK and then there was a conspiracy to cover-up the assassination. It was an inside job, with participation of the new Commander-in-Chief, J Edgar Hoover’s FBI and other elements of American Intelligence. The Military Industrial Complex was the chief benefactor.

With the fall of the Soviet Union, the immediate military threat from Moscow was diminished. While modern Russia is no friend of peace or to the United States, the nuclear tension of the Cold War is no more what it once was. Cold War advisor, “the father of containment” (policy against the spread of communism), George Frost Kennan understood the impact on American Industry should the USSR no longer present a viable threat…

Were the Soviet Union to sink tomorrow under the waters of the ocean, the American military-industrial establishment would have to go on, substantially unchanged, until some other adversary could be invented. Anything else would be an unacceptable shock to the American economy.

With the Cold War over, where would the Military Industrial Complex turn for a new adversary? While I am confident the JFK Assassination was an inside job, I cannot suggest with as much confidence that the events of 9/11 were also orchestrated from within the American government. Regardless of the means of how 9/11 occurred, the ends represented a boon for the Military Industrial Complex: nearly endless war in Afghanistan and Iraq, the rise of drones and drone spending, the increased dependency on intelligence gathering.

Julian Assange, hiding out in Ecuadoran Embassy in London. Edward Snowden, granted temporary asylum in Russia.

Julian Assange, hiding out in Ecuadoran Embassy in London. Edward Snowden, granted temporary asylum in Russia.

With the sudden transparency of American duplicity gained through WikiLeaks and Snowden’s disclosures, many were shocked at the extent of intelligence gathering by the NSA and other alphabet agencies. Perhaps because I dawdle so much in the shadows, these were hardly revelations to me. I have always assumed my phone bugged, my emails hacked, my online activity monitored, my drinking water fluoridated, my brain scanned by airport security and my bath time observed through infrared by hovering spy blimps. So goes the life of Vic Neverman. So goes the Intelligence Machine of the Military Industrial Complex. The more it feeds, the greater the appetite grows. With the only oversight an oblivious congressional panel, the Intelligence Machine was bound to test the full extent of its reach, sticking its nose into the private parts of the American public like a pig snouting for truffle. Anyone who would expect the NSA to behave politely is naïve.

Quis custodiet ipsos custodes? (Latin, “who will guard the guards, themselves?”)

– Juvenal, Roman poet 2000 years ago

Which brings us to the crossroads… as deceptions are uncovered, where will the Intelligence Machine go from here? Julian Assange and Edward Snowden (quirky, smarmy, creepy fellows as fellows go) have haphazardly made our secrets public, which has pissed-off the targets of American spying (American public, countless American allies and… the Vatican!?), stunting American diplomacy and anti-terrorism collaboration into the unforeseeable future. Will their efforts rewrite the programming of the Intelligence Machine, scaling back its advances? Will Assange and Snowden be written about as heroes in tomorrow’s history books? Or will the transnational Military Industrial Complex whitewash the record of American trespasses, adapt to the transparent environment and overcome by innovating new methods of duplicity? My money is on the latter.

Who Watches the Watchmen?

Who Watches the Watchmen?

Don’t you know that a midnight hour comes when everyone has to take off his mask? Do you think life always lets itself be trifled with? Do you think you can sneak off a little before midnight to escape this?

― Søren Kierkegaard

Edward Snowden, or the fella alleged to be Edward Snowden, continues to lurk within the shadows of Hong Kong. His public announcements about the benefits of Hong Kong hiding counter the sentiment of the masses. Snowden claims, from whichever safe house he barters his power-point spreads in return for a taste of fame (or her cross-eyed, slutty sister, infamy), that Hong Kong is a well thought-out location for him to fight his legal battles against the pending charges of treason (courtesy of the Espionage Act of 1917, kept snug in Obama’s hip pocket). From what I can gather, however, Snowden’s point is true only if protected (held captive) by China. Hong Kong may be semi-autonomous, but ultimately Beijing has veto power and may easily take advantage of the snowflake that fell, perhaps unwittingly, into their totalitarian lap. Out of the frying pan and into the wok for you, Mr. Snowden.

out of the fryer and into the wok

out of the fryer and into the wok

Why would a whistle-blower, assumingly protecting the American people from the legitimate Police State threat that is the NSA, turn to an authoritative regime in China whose humanitarian and censorship practices are the most egregious in the world? Damn good question. I have already voiced my doubt in the very existence of this Edward Snowden. Whether this character is directly pulled from the gut-spilling secrets of the “Snowden” bombardier in Catch 22 or is inspired by the Canadian rapper Snow, who admitted in his one-hit wonder, “a licky boom boom down, it doesn’t really matter. Something is gravely amiss about this NSA whistle-blower.

Informer... (random mutterings) yeah, a licky boom boom down

Informer… (random mutterings) yeah, a licky boom boom down

A deep-throated confidant, who calls himself Reverend Chette, echoes my concerns and suggests the existence of Snowden, in itself, is a plot of the Obama administration to draw attention away from the IRS and Benghazi scandals. From Prague, I have received word from the exiled Apocalypto Survivalist, Cyrus Lee Hancock, who insists that all this focus on Snowden (his life, his girlfriend, his proclivities) is itself a smoke and mirrors act designed to take our eyes away from the NSA’s Prism Project. While I, Vic Neverman, am an advocate in favor of transparency in government, I cannot hide my absolute suspicion of this strange cat, Edward Snowden.

But nevermind the small talk! Let us get to the point at hand: What would an American exile do if trapped in Hong Kong?

East Asia

The easiest avenue would be to get into bed with the capitalist commies of Beijing. Snowden could live as a king for as long as he seemed worth China’s while. Imagine if he decides to work for China’s Blue Army – the elite hackers of the People’s Liberation Movement who are clogging your inbox with spam like an elephant in musth hovering over your keyboard. Snowden could live like a king indefinitely.

Should he turn his nose up to Beijing and their oppressive rule, he will need to stray further than Cambodia, Vietnam, Laos and North Korea. While these locales are local enough, their regimes are just as totalitarian and/or are fed on China Red.

Central America

Should Snowden change his appearance and join the merchant marines, he might manage to sail his way to Panama en route to deliver several iProducts to New York for redistribution. Along the canal, Snowden may jump ship and find a jungle bungalow to lay low in. He should mind the history of John McAfee, the internet tech guru who created his own little kingdom in Belize complete with pharmaceutical labs and 17 year-old girlfriends before his paranoia (and the sudden deaths of his neighbors) sent him into hiding. Belize hunted him until he escaped into Guatemala. Guatemala promptly caught him and sent him to Miami. Central America is not the best place to hide anymore.


Sure, follow the path of Bobby Fisher, who grew old reciting the Protocols of Zion. No thanks. Reykjavik might be the home of the most beautiful women in the world, which might draw Snowden’s eyes, but it is bloody cold. And to quote Edward Snowden’s “TheRealHoohah” cyber alter-ego according to Slate:

I also don’t see the allure of “Scandinavian” countries, but that’s simply because I don’t want to live in a country where warmth and comfort are only spoken of in bedtime stories.


While Moscow would consider offering Snowden asylum (according to Russian media), the strikes against Iceland (cold) and China (totalitarian regime) would certainly be present here. For Snowden to hand himself over to Mother Russia would make him the most renown and likely hated American turncoat defector of the Cold War (and yes, the Cold War is still going on).

Ecuador, Venezuela or Cuba

Neverman takes watch over Quito, Ecuador

Neverman takes watch over Quito, Ecuador

These are frequent escape destinations for American ex-pat exiles. I, myself, have visited Ecuador and Cuba looking for possible bungalow retreats (amongst other things). With the instability of Venezuela and Cuba in the sudden void of recent leaders (Hugo and Fidel), there is no telling the future of these regimes. Ecuador does seem settled into populist politics and have shown their dedication by putting up with the indefinite residence of Julian Assange in their London Embassy. The problem becomes, then, how to get himself to Quito?

The Ultimate Escape

The British government has already informed their Hong Kong based airlines they are not to allow Edward Snowden to board their aircraft. Should Snowden find transport, he needs to be careful of any layovers. There are no direct flights to Reykjavik, for example. A layover in an American-friendly stop would have Snowden in chains very quickly.

There is, ultimately, only one way out: Pseudocide. Edward Snowden must fake his own death. Of course, for a person of such infamy with limited wealth, faking your own death to throw off the hounds of the free world is easier said than done. Unless… those hounds were in on it to begin with.I would not be surprised if Snowden is a CIA plant and that Langley is already planning an end to this alter-ego, one way or another.

Edward Snowden, spilling his guts about the NSA

Edward Snowden, spilling his guts about the NSA

Snow: "Informer, a licky boom boom down"

Snow: “Informer, a licky boom boom down”

You better make your face up in
Your favorite disguise.
With your button down lips and your
Roller blind eyes.
With your empty smile
And your hungry heart.
Feel the bile rising from your guilty past.
With your nerves in tatters
When the conch shell shatters
And the hammers batter
Down your door.
You’d better run.

–          Pink Floyd, Run Like Hell

Earlier this week, I blogged about the unlikelihood of this Snowden character and the direct parallels to the war satire, Catch 22. Last night, trumpeted by the bullfrogs outside my window arrived the witching hour and with it a message from my old fear-mongering foe, Reverend Chette. While in the past the good Reverend has attempted to scare me shitless with his dire prognostications of the fate of one Victor Ulysses Neverman, this message was instead a confirmation of my suspicion about Snowden’s legitimacy. In short, Reverend Chette believes this NSA leakage uproar a smokescreen hiding whatever clandestine mechanization might be going on in the dim background.

Below is his message in full. I would like to offer some defense of a true victim of this Snowden scandal: the now ex-girlfriend, Lindsay Mills. While it is very likely she will cash in on this new fame as America’s newest “reality” celebrity, it is possible she has been bamboozled by the Snowden she loved and left to burn in the spotlight of the paparazzi. For one: the media (and Rev Chette) have already portrayed her as a professional pole dancer. I have read enough of her blogs and other reports to refute this – she is a professional dancer for a ballet troupe in Hawai’i and she happens to have a blog where she describes herself as a pole-dancing superhero and post half-naked photos of herself along with a video of her pole dancing. There is obviously a difference between an artist and a lap-dancing opportunist. Hmmm… perhaps I too am blinded. I have always been a sucker for a damsel in distress.

Here is the girlfriend’s blog, L’s Journey (it appears the high volume of site traffic has forced the blog-site to deactivate this page, try reading what the British muckrakers have dug up here). The more I think of it… perhaps she was the agent provocateur pulling Snowden’s puppet strings.

As promised, Reverend Chette’s rant in full:

Good Evening Vic,

I know it’s been quite a while since our last correspondence, but I’ve found the developments of the past few weeks/days too irresistible not to risk reaching out. As you know, my contacts deep within the shadowy confines of the unstoppable machine give me more insight than the sheep-herded masses, and what I’m about to tell you will hopefully help you navigate the perilous waters of current events.

At this point I’m sure you are asking “why me?” Well, let’s just say you are the lucky bastard that I decided to use to get the word out. Sorry to be so blunt, but I don’t have time to pussy-foot around when it comes to important matters such as these, and per our previous conversations and interactions, you seem to be a man than is open-minded enough to realize the true breadth of what I’m talking about.

Now, down to the brass tax. Since you are a connected man, I’m sure you have expert knowledge about what is currently taking place regarding the leaking of information about one of our favorite gov’t agencies. Mr. Snowden, as you have heard, is a man seemingly on the run, touting himself as a savior to the common man and a beacon of light for society as a whole.

Vic, like myself, I figure you have been a little skeptical of how “convenient” this all seems. I can confirm to you now, per my very good sources, that this is indeed entirely too convenient. If this were a football game, this last play by our Administration would be comparable to the old “Statute of Liberty” formation. They want us to look for the pass, while their minions run down the sideline after a reverse handoff. This is from the old school playbook. Moves like this are so old, that when someone finally pulls it out of the hat again after such a long moratorium, it seems original. Except, in this case, they don’t want you to know it’s taking place at all.

Back in the good ol’ days, we used to run similar schemes like this all the time, just on a smaller scale. This one is brazen, and I’ll be damned if it ain’t working. Forget Snowden…the guy is nothing more than a smokescreen, a distortion, an invention of our current Administration, and of connected individuals with an interest in making sure that the people retain (or regain) trust in their government.

I’m sure your first question is “why would they do this to themselves?” And, “what do they have to gain?” That my friend, is where this gets interesting. These people are not stupid, and they don’t play around when it comes to keeping the status quo in place. Most people in this country would just dismiss what I’m about to tell you because it seems too far-fetched. Not me. I’ve been in the trenches. I know how these people work and how they think. I know what is at stake for them, and what they stand to lose.

If Snowden is real, he is only real in body. He’s an obvious plant by our own gov’t to take the focus away from more important issues and potential problems that could creep up as a result of the numerous scandals that had taken our Administration by storm recently. From the IRS scandal to the Benghazi incident, this Administration and other parts of our gov’t have been up to their eyeballs in shit for far too long, and it was appearing they would be there a while longer…all under Mr. Snowden appeared out of the blue to save the day.

Mr. Snowden, however he was deceived or enticed into doing this (probably with an amount of money that will make him a very rich man), will eventually go down as nothing more than a young, naive, loose cannon with an inferiority complex, and a burning desire for attention. You or I may not be happy with those labels if it were us in his shoes, but if the price was right, we might just consider giving up our life to live one in some foreign fantasy land of prostitutes with a dump truck full of cash. Why Snowden exactly? I’m not entirely sure, but considering how classic this move it, I’m sure there was a good reason for choosing him.

Oh, and the girlfriend story? Ha! That was probably some of the funniest shit I’ve read in quite a while. In fact, like Mr. Snowden himself, it was just too convenient. These guys are good, but someone really needs a lesson from an old pro like me in how to run diversion tactics. I mean, really…a world traveling pole dancer? What the fuck were these guys thinking? The guy that was responsible for coming up with that lame nonsense must have cringed when he read that in actual print. If not, I hope someone has a hole already dug for him in the desert, because that fucking moron is going to give the whole organization away. At times like this, I wouldn’t mind selling out again and jumping back into the game just to slap the shit out of someone.

You see, they are willing to take a hit for a few days if the end-game will be that they will be proven right – that these government programs are legal, legit, and are being run with the correct checks and balances. While the mainstream media, bloggers, and critics go apeshit saying “I told you so!!” in the near-term, the long-run scheme is to take one for the team, and live to fight another day. Once the wailing and gnashing of teeth is over, and they are proven to be correct, then not only have they scored a major blow for their credibility, but they have pushed the real issues to the back burner long enough that ether the majority of the public and major news media tire of the old story, or in an effort not to make themselves look stupid again, they decide to “move on.” Either way, this buys them time, and most importantly, it buys them credibility, even if they have to cheat to get it. Remember, this is not civics class, as I know you are well aware. This is the real world – one that most people never see, especially not Americans that are more worried about buying their next car, planning their next vacation, or watching episodes of Jerry Springer, to really care or to ask about what really goes on.

So, as for the Snowden story, I call complete bullshit. If you want the real scandal, keep your eye on the IRS, or dig deeper to find the real gem hidden in the weeds. My educated assessment, based on my years of experience in the field, tell me that they must be desperate to divert from something. Is the potential of the IRS story really that great? Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe, they are running down the sideline behind our defense now while we continue to watch the QB.

Stay safe,


Catch 22: Yossarian hovers over a dying Snowden

Catch 22: Yossarian hovers over a dying Snowden

Man was matter, that was Snowden’s secret. Drop him out a window, and he’ll fall. Set fire to him and he’ll burn. Bury him and he’ll rot, like other kinds of garbage. The spirit gone, man is garbage. That was Snowden’s secret. Ripeness was all.

― Joseph Heller, Catch 22

After the whistles blew, uncovering extensive surveillance of the American people by the National Security Agency, outrage filled the headlines. The streets, themselves, were quiet, but the media went apeshit. I, Vic Neverman, skipped over the story as a non-event, what I perceived to be common knowledge. In Bluffsdale, Utah, NSA’s Spy City is being erected to store each of our phone conversations, texts, tweets and emails where their algorithmic spider-bots crawl over the words in search of suspicion worth red-flagging. This is going to be the Tower of Big Brother Babel. But what is the point of building a Spy City if the NSA isn’t going to poach records from Verizon and the rest of corporate infomerica? This latest whistle-blowing is only news to the mainstream.

Julian Assange, CIA patsy or just pastey? Seen here today at the Ecuadoran Embassy.

Julian Assange, CIA patsy or just pastey? Seen here today at the Ecuadoran Embassy.

What did raise a brow of suspicion is this Edward Snowden character, the confessed leaker. It is a strange, treasonous age we live in, where these whistleblowers become celebrities. We never learned much about the Wiki-Leaker Bradley Manning before the Pentagon put him in the dungeon, but we now all about Julian Assange, the Godfather of Leakage currently hiding out in an Ecuadoran Embassy in London and this dude is total creepers (and setup according to the Cubans). The latest to the party is Snowden, formerly anonymously known as Verax (which is Latin for “kitchen stain remover” or some shit like that), the tech contractor employed by Booz Allen Hamilton and who, from the luxury of his Hong Kong hotel hideout, gave his big scoop to the Guardian and the Wash Post.

(curious about who the heck is Booz Allen Hamilton? see this profile from Top Secret America)

Something is rotten in the Land of Danes as this dude stinks like thawed red herring. First, “Snowden” is obviously another pseudonym, a name borrowed from Joseph Heller’s classic war satire, Catch 22. It was the character Snowden who dies in Yossarian’s arms; Snowden, whose spilt guts tell the protagonist bombardier the “secret” of man and man’s mortality. Yossarian is driven mad with the secret, yet also enlightened with the knowledge that death is inevitable.

Edward Snowden, spilling his guts about the NSA

Edward Snowden, spilling his guts about the NSA

This Snowden, too, is something of a martyr of enlightenment – or so he likes to portray himself. According to him, instead of living out a comfy existence in Hawai’I with his girlfriend and 6-figure salary, he decided to go public with the NSA’s dirty laundry. He says he thought long and hard about the negative impact this will have on his family. He says he realizes he will never be able to go home.

Ed Snowden has all the makings of a disingenuous, self-righteous douchebag.

Don’t get me wrong – I am pro-transparency. I am anti-fascist. I am against the Police State watching me watching them watching me. I think Bradley Manning is a hero, but a treasonous one that should be punished according to our laws. I believe Julian Assange is doing great work; just that he is another self-righteous, self-appointed savior of our liberties and a dick. Time will tell what we learn about this Snowden dude. We don’t yet know the ends to know if they justify his means. Apparently, the whistle tune he blew was so shocking the press will only release a fraction of it. It is hard to tell, yet, just how necessary it was for Snowden to sacrifice his lap of luxury for the benefit of our perverse private texts, but we are bound to learn more.

Cue Julian Assange, who just crawled out of his Ecuadoran Embassy hole in London to propose Snowden for sainthood and to offer Wiki-Leaks up to host all the dirty little secrets of Snowden’s spilt entrails. We may very soon learn much more…

Who is Spain?
Why is Hitler?
Where are the Snowdens of yesteryear?

― Joseph Heller, Catch 22